March 05, 2012

To Be Happy. Is simple.

To be happy is not always about having a lot of virtual friends whom you don’t even know if they’re true. To be happy is as simple as having few number of friends who can come when you get injured or when you have to stay at hospital because of disease.

To be happy is not always about having luxury cars or having that things which label “fancy”. To be happy is as simple as walking in sunshiny day and bring your old walk-man listen to happy song.

To be happy is not always about sitting there in a luxury restaurant and eating expensive food with your tuxedo or your fancy mini dress. To be happy is as simple as bring your friend or relatives or your love to come in your house, together make a dishes for dinner, and laughing while somebody filled wrong ingredients in the food.

To be happy is not always about travelling around the world with first-class airplane, to be happy is as simple as explore strange town in your country and found an old village with people and kids gathering, chattering without thinking that they might have nothing to eat for tomorrow.

To be happy is not always about having pretty face, have ideal body and winning a beauty contest or some kind like that. To be happy is as simple as look at the mirror and seeing that how good is your looks when you smile.

To be happy is not always about surrounded by rich friends with high-cost lifestyle. To be happy as simple as helping someone out-there who struggle to fight his/ her cancer or help special needs friend to feel confidence and show them that you care.

To be happy is not always about having a perfect guy/ girl from child-hood fairy tale. To be happy as simple as making your love whoever he/ she is ,feel awesome and feel secure whenever he/ she stand beside you.

To be happy is not always about having much money in your pocket or debt and buy things that you want easily. To be happy is as simple as you use your money to giving a food for random homeless people, and see them smile at you for your kindness.

To be happy is not always about watching a comedy movies at theatre and you can forget the story soon after the show’s over. To be happy is as simple as talking with some old friends and remembering all good times we had spent together, and laughed at old jokes we had made.

To be happy is not always spent your weekend with friends hanging-out to hit place in your city. To be happy is as simple as tidy up your house with your family, eat dinner together, and get the moment when you could said in your heart “how do I lived without them”.

To be happy is not always about having a job with good salary and pay bills for party. To be happy is as simple as get a small job with small salary and use the money to help poor and rest to buy your parent small things they always need to help their house work.

To be happy is as simple as being grateful for every things happened in you life and let it be every time life bring you some hard times. To be happy is to smile and believe that there’s something to gain after all obstacles you have passed. To be happy is to have an ability to feel. Feel the simple happiness around you.

February 14, 2012


I do it for my lord, i know i had too much mistakes and sins in life, but i always asked for his forgiveness and his blessing for all my step. i know he’s the one who know what the best for his people.

I do it for both my parent, cause the most important achievement of my life is to make them proud of me,seeing me on the top of my life, and seeing that their long life effort was worth.

I do it for my passed away grand mother , for all her love and care in past life.

I do it for my family, as the last hope of son in family, i do it for them to bring them happiness and proud as a family.

I do it for my pride as a man, to become a man with respect and a man with value.

I do it for my lover, to found that place beautiful place to life and spend the rest of our life with brave and proud.

I do it for living my life

These all the reasons why I have to struggle to live in this world

February 09, 2012

A Man, a “single” status, and mind.

“What bests in man’s life is having a woman who want through all the happy and sad moments to live life together”

That’s phrase was continued running in my mind, and remembered one song from 311 and taylor swift “Two is better than one”. Sometimes i frustrated about being single in my age, sometimes I feel jealousy when look at two happy couple whom enjoy their relationship and never worry about anything. Yes of course it because of my worries, I worried too much about having relationship, I could saying that I’m kind a conservative person in what I belief in one relationship. So what I think that kind a man like me thought about having relationship?

First I think relationship is one of most serious thing in people’s life, it’s about you trust someone to get in to yourlife and knowing all of bad and good side about your self. I’m kind a man who won’t let haphazard people to get in my life and know that much about my self, It’s quite hard to place trust on someone, right? It’s too serious because as a man I will love the one whole heartedly and I have to protect her even more I have to bring her to wisdom of life, in religion i beliefs in, as a man I will lead her in relationship further in family, a man is the man in that ship, the captain who will decide where to go and what to do. I know some feminist couldn’t be agreed about what I said, but I think most woman want her future man and husband do those things. I always think to lead is a man thing.

“behind a great man, there’s a great woman”

That quotes is one of man’s considerate to make decision to get in relationship with woman. I do believe in man and woman destiny to fullfill one another complete each other. Trustworthy relationship is really hard to get and lucky factor works in it. I mean, sometimes you gotta be lucky to find this relationship, which can give feedback and doesnt let any of selfishness in head playing in relationship, a great man oftenly is a stubborn man and it’s hard to stubborn man to live with another rules, they have their own rules in their life, but there’s always a great woman who can make this kind of man to fall and down give full respects and obey what she’s saying. Who is she? There she is, a great woman that’ve already found, love of his life. One thing that I believe in too that, yes a man have to become a great man first, to find a great woman. So what’s definition of either great man and great woman. In my definition great man is a person who already know what he’s doin, a man who can first lead his self cause how come a man leads other when he can’t even lead his self. To be a great man, every each man has his own journey, the journey is including journey to find the one (woman) to sit side by side with him to share life. What is great woman indeed? In my head definition, great woman is a woman who founded by a man on his journey, who suddenly can turn on man’s life without any reasonable thing, who suddenly can stop a man with her thought and woman who let man becoming a man. Girs, do you understand what I’m saying to let a man becoming a man? There’s a quotes which said “man gotta do what man’s gotta do” this woman has to believe that this man is a man who can be count to lead her life, give him advice but never judge what he’s doing.

I believe that both man and woman have journey to finding wisdom in their life, that’s human. As a man believe me, it’s become harder cause we have responsibility in future to lead. Some man just get over it, but some man doesn’t. Some man choose to get in too deep in this causes, they need times to grow, and sometimes it does not as simple as woman think. Further in the age of 20 something, man gotta think about what will he do for life, what will he do to teach, what will he do for family, what will he given to his life. Sometimes we just think too much. Man have to struggle to fight on his own perception and fight on his own selfishness, emotionally man have to be stable and always have cool head to choose every decision and to take any risks of life. Man, we are just too shame because we don’t want to make woman we love, laughed at reckelss thing we did, we just afraid we can’t make woman we love happy and feel secure be there beside us, and we afraid of in unstable condition commitment we made won’t let us too choose for life we wants.

I don’t roughly saying that man afraid of commitment. No we don’t. That’s what woman have to understand man who spend many times just with his self and doesn’t make relationship even they have looked mature and settled enough to having one, they have reasons like I said, they do their journey to become a great man, we won’t playing with relationship, we want to become better person to love, better person to give, and better person to understand, we won’t make people we love then sad and we won’t make people dissapoint, we want to get affection, we want to having woman who greets us every single morning, and always remind us to make everything neat, but the emotion to doesn’t want make this woman sad push us to stay single and just built our life and character first, and then give it to woman we love, and lead the relationship to one goal to complete each other. It’s hard, isn’t it? To become settled in emotion and never break anyone’s heart..

February 07, 2012

The Film "Dolphin Tale"

Here’s another inspiring film. Dolphin Tale, when I write this I was still freezing and some of my mind got real peaceful feeling. Peace, that’s one word which can describe this film, you know what I mean because I got the peace after watched this film. This film tell us about stories of Boy who turn on something that he really loved to, as always people said that love is not just about men and women. It can be with many things, just like in this film love between a men and animal. What make this film more awesome caused this film based on true story, story of struggled of men to helps this dolphin back to swim with her tail. Well, I think I start to making confuse, I will start to tell the story.

Sawyer was an introvert and type of kids who had easily to bullied in his school. It makes him bad when his cousin Kyle decided to go to military school and left him. Slawyer’s like lost his excitement of life, he’s oftenly late for school, not doing his homework, and abandoned of his school life. Here’s the turning point, when he rode bike for school he met untangles a hurt dolphin that is caught in a crab trap, he tried to help the dolphin until the officer from Marine hospital come, and bring the dolphin to the hospital. Slawyer helped to take care of this dolphin as he and the Dolphin named winter have undescribeable emotional attraction each other. One day comes news that surprising which Winter’s tail has to be taken off to save her life, cause of some infection. And it goes, the tail being cut off, Winter’s being kind a defective dolphin with no tail. It comes hope when winter start to swim with moves her back bones side to side, but normally dolphin swim with moves up and down. This kind of swim colud be damage Winter body more so she has to stop. The more trouble when the marine hospital have to closed because there’s no person who want to give fund to run the hospital.

Another inspirational story comes from Kyle, Sawyer’s cousin whom got to military school. Some accident made him to stop his school and further made him can’t do his normally life, his body was attacked and caused some critically damage so he can’t move some parts of his body. Sawyer meet him at the hospital, first he don’t wan to meet because of depression, but not taking too long until he changed his mind. Kyle’s story is also have a deep meaningful part of this film, in fact of his defective body part, he shows and inspire people not to surrender of weakness and don’t let our hurt body make us broken. At this hospital Sawyer meets Dr.McCurthy, he is specialist of making prosthetic (fake) bones to human. Dr.McCurthy whom played by Morgan Freeman, as always he become a good – wise man, he helped much in order to fix all the problem.

Dr.McCurth helped Sawyer and all marine hospital officer to help Winter, with make her brand new prosthetic tail. Yet, it cannot be as easy as people think, they made the tail like three times until the tails really fits to Winter. And problem with hospital’s fund is being closed with social acts which designed by Sawyer and Hazel which had titled “Save-Winter’s-Day”.

What makes film good? Yeah because it affected our life, and I’m pretty sure there are many people who had influenced because of this film. Many lessons that we could learnt. This is film was created for everyone and everypeople, for those who surrender of their life, for those who think they’re defective just cause they lost some of their body parts, for those who had perfection to realize that they have something to keep and they have to do something for those who don’t. this film teach us humanity and most of them this film teach us about love. Love and being loved. Never give up, brave to struggle and fight even you might lost at least we have did the bravest thing we can do. Trust me, peace come after watch this movie, you gotta said thank to God because give you perfection of body, and what the reason for us to quit our ambitions? There’s no reason. Just watch the movie till the end, I give it 5 stars out of 5 caused i have to admit it made me cry (a bit. I swear).

January 03, 2012

The art of losing

It’s been my very first time post in this beginning of 2012. Some people might write about some positively optimistic things on their blog to start a year, yet I choose to write this kind of maybe a sorrow post just to devote what I’ve been feeling right now. I believe that all people in this world had ever feel like losing something, losing one word could be related to many things . It could be something you can feel with your body or something that you can just only feel in your heart or it can be both in the same time. You may cause part of empty room in your daily life when you lose a thing, day after you start to miss that lost thing. Now, I wanna talk about losing something that might be caused kind of deep sense of loss in your whole daily life, that is losing someone that you love.

What do you know about loss? Some people maybe could yelled at my face about this. I don’t know much about losing, I don’t want to act like an expert of this probs. But based on my own experienced I had some stories about losing someone that I love, because of death or because of many reasonable or unreasonable things. That what I said at first, losing might cause you made some empty room in your heart, what is if it’s about someone that you loved the most?. It’s painful because the time you have to lose someone oftenly comes in unprediction, it suddenly strike you like heartless when you feels like everything was just going right and beautiful. We might be speechless, but it is happened, at that time for some people they might think that they’re the most miserable person in this world, some part of their life just gone, and we have no idea how to pass the next day without that missing piece of our heart. For some people could made stubborn decision, how to erased all memories we had about this missing piece and how to replaced that missing piece with new one, not an easy work indeed.

No limit about sense of loss, man or woman they’re just the same in the art of losing. Maybe they cried because they loss people they loved. It’s like not that easy to move on, to wake up from sense of depression. That another phase, depression some people thing that was exaggerate word, but that could be one word that decent to a loss heart, broken-hearted. Another day we will pass will be different without them, there’s some routinity that we stop doing, and we will disconnect to some other people that closed to our beloved person. Here comes we start new routine with mad head and fragile heart. First day you think your life just stop, another day you think you can move on and said that life goes on, next day maybe you start depression again, and it will be repeated until the time you can’t notice. Many question goes round in our head, how could this happened? Who’s wrong? . or maybe some regretful question. Why don’t we discuss it first? Why we are not meant to be together? Why he/she is being that cruel? I’m so sorry for that things undone, I’m sorry for made that foolish decision. We should have not doing this. however, you still can do nothing, it is happened and you’ve got to face it. Well, old adage will always right. You won’t miss something until it’s gone.

Recovery time. Time heals. You start to live a new habit, some reason you don’t feel it when you can finally move on, the missing piece already buried in some place deep in your heart. We start to think that it is better to be alone and doesn’t think about anybody than ourselves. After we recover, we just need some time again to think about somebody else and make the past become just memories.

The most important thing from art of losing is the lesson you gain. If you don’t take any lessons from that time, you will just stuck to same person you were. Need time to contemplate, and consideration to make you ready to another commitment with new person. We need to be better person and we want to spend rest of our live with someone we love and someone we deserve. Good man is for a good woman, and so does the opposite. The art of losing may be just a phrase that describes a phase everyone will faced. Losing someone – get some depression – you think you can’t move on whereas you’re actually not – wake up from depression – recovery time – time to gain a lessons and contemplate – time to start a new journey of love life – better person in loving. Grow up, think hundred times when you play with another’s heart, think before you act, never regret every decision you’ve made. Art of loving will be better to be learn than Art of losing.

January 01, 2012


I do promise that I want to write about the journey of KTF UI, a group of dance which I’ve been in since sSeptember 2010. First I had never imagine that I can go abroad with mission to spreading Indonesian traditional music and dance, I can’t even do dancing, and I bet I used to be bad dancer ever. This chance come from my close friend Cessa. She’s invited me to join KTF, but I told her, I’m not that good in that kind of motoric activity, but when she offered me a chance to representate Indonesia in Europe through dancing. I have no word beside YES I’M IN ! Cessa introduced me to Milla, she’s the dance couch of KTFUI and with my Nandak in Abnon experienced she’s obviously believe that I can do dancing. Then I had some interview with KTF founder named Anneke and Olla, after they finally made decision that I deserved to join. KTF didn’t have any guy member since the first time its found, this cultural mission made KTF need to recruit some guy. Here we are, after some close reqruitement process they meet us. Me, Ayip, Sindhu, Adlan, and Adri at the first time we might be not very excited, but the excitement getting higher during the process of reach that goal Du Sud’s cultural mission 2011. And here the process.

We have to practice and practice very hard to got professional skill of tradition dancer and musician. We practiced like two days in a week first, yet the intensity of practice increase when it closer to our depart time, we can even practice all day long until night fall. We practiced several danced that representate some part of Indonesian region and island, here is the list of the dance:

  • Saman dance from Aceh,
  • Piring dance from West Sumatra,
  • Marsitami – tami from North Sumatra,
  • Gaba – Gaba from Maluku,
  • Mpok Ngigel from Betawi,
  • Zapin dara which kind a Melayu dance,
  • Kencet gantar dance from Borneo island,
  • Pendet dance from Bali,
  • Gewaya dance from East Nusa Tenggara,
  • Topeng Mpok Ngigel from Betawi.

Each person have some role of dance, most of us have to do two until three dance, but special for man we have to do four dance, because of we had just few number of man compare with woman. Talk about the 32 member of KTF’s cultura, misson, here I list the name of our group:

Aurora Yusdar. Anneke Puspa Calliandra. Cindy Amelia. Jamila Siregar. Cessa Putri Wahyuni. Tri Hapsari Soesilo Putri. Ayip Lufti Hidayatullah. Aldi Hawari. Sindhunata Hargyono. Karima Irfandi. Adri Humam. Imam Firmansyah. Hazimi Adlan. Nyoman Sri Handayani. Siti Rahayu Permatasari. Novely. Melanie Setyaningrum. Shelby Liriara. Dian Rahma. Gea Adhasta. Gemelli Eka Putri. Tyas Puspo Wardani. Rizky Amelia. Firly Amalia Rizky. Hasty Triana Putri. Fauzia Rahamtika. Rienjani Nur Bani. Shinta Dewi Octavianie. Merija Lovita Kintamani. Shalita Anindya. Tarawina Raiyanasari. Sisy Rahman

Is not that easy to manage all the 32 people to practice together, arrange the schedule of meeting, and so on. But we went through all the proccess. We had done many things, happy, sad, struggle. We have responsibility to our study, but we have to become professional because we choose to be involved in this cultural mission.

Several kind of processes beside practice that we should face are: Collecting money (this is the hardest part, general meeting, propose for sponsorship, manage Radha Sarisha (farewell performing before we depart), propose to get visa Schengen, and many all.

Very interesting part that we could never forgot is how we collect money. Money that we should have for this cultural mission is very big number, we should at least reach 500 million rupiahs (US$ 50.000) to make everything goes well. With big determination and optimistic view of us, we could collect that big number of money. How we get money? That’s a question that have very long story to be answered. We do everything to get that money, from zero until have 5 and 8zero behind. We sell snack foods to our friends, we propose sponsorship, we went to crowd place at weekend to selling cold drink, we ask money to our parent, we propose money to university, and many things in case of reach that 500 million rupiah. We somtimes got some mockery from people whom like make fool of us, some people underestimate our effort to get that money, because they think that we did such a ridiculous way, but after all finished, we could mock them back, and talk to their face hello people we made it, we go to Europe, and you still here do nothing.

We are the 32 members of KTFUI become very close to each other, we have passed many phase of time happy, sad, fight, tired, laugh, smile together. From every part we have already passed we can get many lessons, from mistake we made we have to admitted it and musn’t repeat again. From good things we had, we should increase that, so we can be better next. This Journey of KTFUI cultural mission can be one of from zero to hero story, from now maybe the mission already done we could take ease breath and continue our ordinary day as usual, yet I have to say This experienced with my beloved 31 friends can be long last memories that will always live forever. Stories that will be too long to shared, but too priceless if we just keep it for ourself.

December 26, 2011


Here comes my new family with great people inside. I have to admit that being one of finalist Abang None Jakarta is one of my childhood dream, yeah when I was kid I saw in television ( I forgot the year), but I know after watched that show, I had plan in my mind, I have to become one of them. And it becomes true. I had join kind a same competition before Kang None Banten province, I got the second place, that was when I’m still 16 years old sounds too young to win that kind of competition. Yet, being finalist of Abang None is a different thing, because it’s more precious and I could say it’s worth for my future. The Abang None Jakarta stories goes on my age of 19..

First I decided to fill the form, I was quite a shy introvert person, with half afro hair, dark skin, and I just newly graduated from my Senior High School. But mother of God, I passed the test interview and took the 5th place or 4th Runner up. I got better confidence to face people around, with my broadcasting background I got the skill, and in this Abang None’s thingy I got the place to applicate what I’ve been studying. I could certainly saying that now I’ve become better in my perspective, better in my communication skill, and my mind is enlargely opened about many kind of new things that come forward. The story goes, winning this competition not only turn around my life into a better life, but also opened many gates for me to got many chances and bring me more new responsibility to handled on.

As an ambassador for not only tourism place but also for teenagers in Jakarta, we’ve been trusted to did some duties to representate Jakarta in many occassion and events. We had also doing many activities for social responsibilty and humanity as well. We have to create a good image of Jakarta, we have to able for being role model for others. Sometimes we got the spot attention when in crowd events, some people could ask for take some pictures with us, that’s why I could said that this duties come along with resposibility, because we’re now a public figure. We oftenly walk right behind our state Governor, or Major of the city with always spreading smile to others, but some people miss understand about this, they thought as Abang None Jakarta we are only mannequin for governor that’s totally wrong. We’re on duty, and our duty is all about hospitality. Abang None Jakarta is trained by many knowledge about tourism, public speaking, hispitality management, manner, and many things. That’s knowlledge we use for promote Jakarta as tourism destination and Indonesia as well, we are care about Indonesian heritage, we are care about image of Jakarta and Indonesia in worldwide eyes. We will sincerely explain people about Jakarta, even in tourism aspect, or another’s aspect you might want to know about our city.

It was one of the best experienced in my life, I’ve met many people with great talent here. I met people whom embraced me to see another side of life. This is the best part of being Abang Jakarta Selatan, I’d love to hear about great person stories. Their story guide me to catch some learn and punch my self that I have to be better more. The journey awaken me up, that this life is a strive and struggle episode. And it makes me realized that we are all grown up, we might not feel it but as times goes, we have to strive for something new, strive for something that bring us to our dream, our future, before it’s too late develop our self with plan, watched the others and never being a person who left behind, to make you worth.

October 23, 2011

Indonesia Youth and Sport Festival, whole day with KTFUI

Today I went to Gelora Bung Karno, Senayan with Cessa, Ayip, and Shalita. We will watch our friend Aming, Olla, Novely, and Bani perform "Bajidor Kahot" dance for Indonesia Youth and Sport Festival. They performed at 13.30, we arrived there at 12.30, so after met them Me, Shalita, and Ayip still have an hour spare time. We decided to walk around the festival, there are many booths there, foods, organizations, we can ask more about many Youth organization, most of them are working on culture, leadership, global relationship, and knowledge. we continue walking then we found another festival, that's like Japanese Culture Festival. There are one booth that attract our attention, Ship For Japan South East Youth Program, one old man come to us and explained about this program, how to register, and what will you do during this program, I amazed with the way this man explained us, he tell us for increase awareness about the scholarship and program to exchange abroad, he said that there is many program that can make us go abroad with free payment, if we serious to find it. he also said about we have to focus on target and start to make our plan to reach our target, if you got a chance don't lose your chance, you have to work hard and win the challange. That old man increase my spirit, I know it won't be imposible to reach my target, especially my target to study abroad. anyway, maybe some of you who read this blog, wanna join this Ship Program, this enrollment will be opened on the middle of march or april next year, just make your calendar, and prepare yourself from now on (note: this program will not be suite for you who afraid water or have a seasick)

And so after finished watch our friends perform we went to IOV booth. IOV is an organization which work on culture, science, and knowledge. This organization work under UNESCO, and it facilitated student and youth organization to go abroad for science or to spread and introduce Indonesian culture. I did it this year on July-September to France and Spain. in IOV booth we met another group from Universitas Pelita Harapan, they had a mission too, and they danced for this festival too. we also watched videos about our last mission, and videos of another group mission. We also help Andris (committe of IOV) a little with explain to booth visitors about IOV and its program.

My day didn't stop in GBK, from GBK we moved to PIM 1. we went to foodcourt craving for some foods and have little silly chit chat. that's what we called friends quality time, after KTFUI's mission to europe for 45 days we never hang out together again, so it's oke to wasting time at mall, window shop, and eating for keep our belonging sense lol. In the middle of we had conversation, we heard about Marco Simoncelli dead. you know him right? one of famous racer in moto GP, he died at the racefield, in Sepang Malaysia. we wonder how's he die, so we found it on browser streaming, that was terrible accident. RIP Marco Simoncelli, may you Race (Rest) in Peace. actually most of us, didn't know much about Simoncelli but we are sorry for his death.

From PIM 1 we moved to PIM 2, we planned to go to Karaoke place there. unlucky us, because of today is a weekend, the store give very expensive price. as an ordinary student, we think we can't postpone to karaoke, and we decide to just down for Pizza hut. eat Pizza, teasing, take photos, we really had a friends time, forget about middle-term which will be happen next week, cause we know this moment is priceless. at seven in evening, we decided to go home, and also after tired of laughing, and already lack of topics to talked.

So today was very fun, and contain a lots of meaning, I found about cool organization like Indonesian Future Leader, Stop bising, Ship for Japan SouthEast youth Program, and many more. I also had really fun day with my friend for KTFUI, Cessa, Ayip, Shalita, Pucun, Olla, Novely and Bani. I could call it like refreshing before mid term test, to boost your mood for doing many tasks that will directly I have to finish, after post this story. you too, don't pushed yourself too much for study, have some rilax first to boost up your mood, don't make your head getting bald. lol..

October 22, 2011

unusual saturday night: me, and two beloved sisters Ka Ade and Ka Putri, and cousin Angga.

So this is my first time after three and a half months I never visit home, I enjoyed my self in with my daily life in my student flat, sometimes I come home just for taking my stuffs I need, I come to my mother house more often. first I just have no idea about what should i do at Saturday after finished class, I went to mechanic to fix my motorbike, it's done just in 20mins, I don't wanna spent another Saturday night alone, then I decided to go home to take some stuffs and meet my sisters. come home, my sister was in a nap, and my other sister was hang out with her bf. so I'm alone, it;s bored, then I remember that was on July my ex said that she sent me a package of gift for my birthday, I haven't see the package, so I looked for it, yeah it's already in my bedroom, I opened the wrap and gotcha, I opened my very late birthday gift from my ex girlfriend. she gave me an angry bird pillow, its nice and she wrote me a notes, so sweet, thanks God I can still make a good relationship with her even we had already broke up. then continue, the rain came hard today, and unlucky me the roof my bedroom got leak. That was really sucks, I had to cover it temporally with a huge plastic bag and pressed it with piece of another roof.

I continued the day with watching TV caused my sister still sleeping, then I ate some snacks till finally my sister (Ka Putri) went out from her room had a water and sit watched TV together with me. we started a clumsy conversation between brother and sister, it is unusual, we are not that open to each other, I know it is always happened when we start to begin a conversation. start from I tell about my broken BlackBerry continue we talked about her job in office, late birthday gift from my ex girlfriend (ps: she like my angry bird pillow, and she use her authority as older sister and took the pillow from me!), conversation flow it begun smooth and usual from heart to heart brother - sister conversation.

In the middle of Putri and me conversation, comes my cousin Angga. what a surprised ! He is my 17 year old cousin, live in Depok too, but because of our business we never meet for a year more or less. He said he wanted to pick up my sister because my aunty asked him, but because there was already too dark for my sister, she didn't want to go. so we just had a chat conversation three of us, me, Putri, and Angga. we shared many things, many stories that opened, some stories are surprising, how Angga whom used to be dumb in his school with many red ink in his report card, now become third rank of class, How Angga's family live now (his father have seven wife's, and he divorced again, and soon will marry another woman), we discussed about family stuffs, we even talked about "Illuminati". this moment is so special, it's rarely happened.

I continued conversation with Putri in her room, while Angga enjoyed watch TV. We had an intimate self-disclosure time, I tell her that I have some problem now with mom, I tell her about my point of view about family, and I tell her what I want and I start to build my dream, I also tell her about everything that used to be unsaid and not opened. and she did too. this moment is priceless, caused first I have a distance with her, it almost a year maybe more I never talk from heart and discussed serious things with her. we shared many things, she pour about her sorrowed when our folks didn't pay attention when she was sicks, and with her achievement. we discussed about our family, our divorced mom and dad, she told me about her feeling, deep inside how she feels, and how broke her heart with some words come careless from our folks mouth. I shared the same problem, I told her about how i have being free now from all that problem, and I tried to accept every things whole-heartedly, and how I now thinks that i live my own life with my own rules without deal with condition can make me feel bad. I'm very happy, that all my question answered, and I think our conversation today have already break down a wall-distance between two of us.

my other sister Ka Ade the eldest one come with her bf, but her bf directly went home. so there are me, Putri, Ka Ade, and Angga now. Ka Ade brought us bucket of KFC for dinner, Angga back home after he finished eat his food. so my self-disclosure time continue with talking to Ka Ade, we didn't talk really much, we mostly talked about house condition, folk roof of my room, electricity, what shoud be repaired from my house, and what should we built up to make it better to live in. night fall, I remembered I can't stay because I have to get back to my student flat because I didn't bring my soft-lens cleanser, and though I didn't plan to stay night cause I didn't bring any of my stuffs such glasses and notebook.

Today was really special, thanks God for I have Ka Ade, Ka Putri, and Angga for this saturday night. thanks for make me deciding a right decision to went home today, at least from now, I feel that I found my missing home, today home made me comfort not just like last day my visit. I know that your family will always being your best place to shared about your problem, your sister or brother will be very best friend to share when you have a problem with your folks and also your life. at least I'm feeling it now, I dunno if its feeling will keep longer, or will be change as the time goes. I just happy now, and this one of memorable Saturday night, better than I spent money for hang out with my friends.

October 21, 2011


There’s nothing to worry about when start this Friday, just like another day, sun rises, weather is hot like usual and yep everythings just happened like another day in october. I went to my campus, wear my white poloshirt and jeans, I thought that today the sun will shine and hot, so I prefer not to wear any kind of clothes which can made me sweating. But, for God sake I had make wrong guess about today’s forecast, hard rain comes in the middle of the day when I still in the class. That was very first hard rain that I’ve met since I’ve been studied in this new building of my campus, actually this new building construction is not already finished yet. There are several side that must have to be conastructed, such as laboratory, canteen, field, library, gymnasium, and many more (that’s why I always think that this building shouldn’t have to be use, its building must be finished before I could say it’s suitable).

There are some question when first time I went to this building for study, we came in summer, hot weather sometimes kill our skin how about when it comes rainy season? And the question is answered in this Friday. Because my campus cafe haven’t finished (still under construction), there are some seller who sells foods in front of this building using a small and simple booth, just like in a food festivals, or another one call it bazaar and all the booth are facilitated by campus administrator. That’s not a bad idea I think, at least we don’t need to find foods outside campus. There are maybe 12 bazaar that sells different kind of foods, the foods is good, but there’s no enough space to eat inside the booth, so if we don’t get the space, the seller will give the foods in a small box, in we eat wherever at anywhere campus side (except in classroom for sure). Hard rain come at the afternoon, that was a terrible rain, I heard the news that some trees are fallen outside the campus, and what happened to my campus? Yep you can guess, all that foods bazaar were in bad condition. Some of the booth fall too, and the seller get wet because they tried to save their things. I feel sorry when I saw the booth, the condition is miserable, they have to paid much to rent the booth, and today the booth fall down because of storm (hard rain) and they lose their foods that should have being sold.

Here’s the booth photos when the rain came slower, see the destruction.

The Friday surprise doesn’t stop in this destroyed of the food booth..

After the rain stop, I have to go to FIB another faculty in my university to attend and watched my friend dancing for UI festival, I support for two team first is KTF from FISIP faculty (that used to be my faculty before decision to separate building of diploma and bachelor’s degree made) and Vision from Vocation faculty that know is my faculty. The festival was crazy, so many supporter come from 13 faculties in my university, they support their team. The dancing that performed by each faculties was amazing. Till here they are what I’ve been wait for... Vision from my faculty performed before KTF. They danced a contemporary dancing which telling a story of Jaka Tarub, a guy who stole a shawl from one of seven beautiful angel. That’s very awesome dance and beautiful dance, that’s not just a dance, I know that was a dance that wanna show this young faculty cannot be under estimated. They made it, they made everyone give their standing ovation. I’m proud of being one of this faculty citizen. Then after Vision, KTF performed with nine dancers, dancing a Melayu dance. I’m speechless, I’m proud and happy with my friend performance, they did it perfect, even the new member do it great, they were look alike professional. I have to admit it, I feel a bit envy because I really want to become of one of KTF dancers on that stage, I miss having stage with them just like we did in Europe for cultural mission for a month. However, I give all my appreciation for them, they have practiced for more than a month each day for this festival, they deserved to be a winner. And I hope KTF can be the winner. So does Vision, no matter the position I know they’ve made it.

This is the top of Panic Friday !
After watching the dance, I went to FISIP to congratulated KTF performance. Suddenly, my sms tone ring. Sms from my classmate, she told that there’s a tasks which have to be sent to my lecture email at 10 this evening. WHATT !!! I surprised, and quickly I put my bag on, and back to my flat. This is bad, I don’t even know what supposed to do with the task, it’s getting worse, when I knew that I haven’t finished doing last week tasks so I have two tasks to finished. I finished the first task “TV Management Programme” but I have no idea about the second task. I try to contact some of friends to explain,but since my blackberry’s broken, I just save few of my friend phone number. GOSSH, it doesn’t work, no respons for anybody. It ruined my head, the clock said that I just have lest an hour left for finished this task, and thank God myfriend Wina answer my call, and give enough explanation. Therefore, I started doing the task, my brain work under pressure of have to sent this task quick or I will lose my point. And yep, the task is done. For Information, I also skip my schedule at my Radio, I should’ve been there for airing, I asked for permition, but there’s no excuse, I can’t find any person who can help to take my schedule, and it makes my manager angry. Haff, so let just have a deep breathing..